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| Jeff Baron's writing, in its many forms, has been published in a wide variety of places. He was a columnist for a Toronto magazine called T.O., writing about the arts and popular culture in New York. He was for a short time a music critic for the New York Daily News. His short story You Know Me, Louise was published in the Dallas Times-Herald Sunday Magazine. He has written about film for the French magazine Tetu. His play Visiting Mr. Green has been published by the Italian magazine Sipario (in Italian, translation by Michela Zaccaria). One of the French versions of the play is published by L'Avant Scène (adaptation by Stéphanie Galland and Thomas Joussier). The English version is published by Dramatists Play Service. Jeff began being published as a teenager. For a few years, he occasionally entered the competitions in the back of New York Magazine. His favorite of his 18 entries that were published appears below. The competition asked you to write an epitaph for someone named Felix Mango. FELIX MANGO Felix Mango worked at Gimbels, Lived in Brooklyn, played the cymbals. Didn't have much, didn't need much. Went to movies, didn't read much. One day Felix met a lady. Legs were great, but motives... shady. She and Felix started dating. Weeknights, weekends, "Taxi's waiting." Nightclubs, Broadway with his honey, Felix soon ran out of money. She told Felix not to worry. "Call this number. Better hurry." Some guy answered, sounded sleazy. "Cash tomorrow. Terms are easy." Felix borrowed, kept on spending Till his source said, "No more lending." No more taxis. "Let's go walking." She said, "Never. We're through talking." Phone rings - "Felix, we got trouble." Get the money on the double." Felix Mango sold his cymbals. Gave up movies, stole from Gimbels. End of Felix, end of balled. Felix Mango's now fruit salad. |
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